And There Was Cake
by SirFluffsALot
Summary: A ship crashes into Dreamland causing four deranged blobs to fix it. However, they encounter stupid reasons to avoid doing so, whether it's going to Walmart to buy a tent for camping, or encountering a museum full of broken glass, cacti, and rabid animals. They befriend an alien and the poor plot progresses from there. Kirby RTD parody. First story. T in case I get carried away.


Once upon a time, there were four "warriors" destined to fix a ship, which had crashed because of Justin Beiber music, a giant dragon, and that's the whole plot of the game. Let's back it up even further than that.

It was a normal day in Dreamland, a place in the planet Popstar. These are where the warriors live. One so-called warrior was a small pink puffball by the name Kirby. His anatomy consisted of being a pink blob with stubby arms and red stubby feet. He could eat anything that didn't eat him first. Somehow he could copy powers too. If he inhaled a sword he'd become Sword Kirby. If he inhaled ice he'd become Ice Kirby. If he'd inhale a political rant he'd be annoying as heck. And so on.

Another acquaintance was a navy puffball similar to Kirby. He had a silver mask which made his eyes appear amber. Bat-like wings were on his back, so he could fly to escape reality. And politics. He was called Meta Knight. He has a major crush on his sword and, out of insanity, named it Galaxia. He is constantly being accused of being a vampire.

The third menace of the group was an overweight penguin by the name of King Dedede. He is a tyrant that rules the creatures of Dreamland. Having a giant hammer that he beats everyone up with it(his favorite target being politics), he is a person(penguin) you definitely want to avoid. His assistant (more like a punching bag) is a snail by the name of Escargoon. Although, he does not appear in this story at all. So let the memory of him being mentioned just disappear in your mind. Painfully.

Thankfully, the last member of this deranged group is a waddle dee named Bandana Dee. He is named that because he is a waddle dee who has a bandana. Because you couldn't guess that. His weapon is a spear which he pokes his members with a lot. This happens to be his favorite hobby, besides cooking.

Now that you know these insane characters the story can now progress!

Once upon a time in the painfully peaceful land, Kirby was running away with his beloved cake while Dedede and Bandana Dee chased him. "Ha ha! You'll never get me and my sweetie~!" Taunted Kirby.

The king let out a low growl. "Sir! It's just a short cake! Can't we just go back to our Bingo game?" Pleaded Bandana Dee. Dedede just scoffed. "And let him ruin my dream of eating my cake? As if!" Panted the out of shape king. Bandana Dee shook his head-...Body. "How long have you had this 'dream'?"

"Since this morning when I made the stupid cake. Now help me catch this thief," ordered Dedede. They ran for a good three minutes until a giant ship tumbled out of the sky. The three of them stared at it dumbfounded, until Bandana started to loose it. "THE SKY IS FALLING! WE'RE ALL GOING TO _DIE__**!" **_Bandana began to ran around in circles and scream made Kirby and Dedede exchange confused looks.

The ship crashed with a loud bang and Justin Beiber in the background(The three of them shuddered because of that).

Meta Knight, who was on a hill top reading a catalog on candy, noticed this explosion and magically warped to Kirby and the others. Meta Knight was about to ask what they did this time when Bandana suddenly crashed into him. Meta knight landed on his back while Bandana face planted into a nearby cactus garden. King Dedede and Kirby winced when Bandana landed.

"Well alright," answered a fallen Meta Knight. King Dedede glanced down at Meta Knight. He snickered and said "Wow Mety, I never realized how short you are," he laughed. This made Meta Knights' eyes glow red (his eyes did that to match some of his moods) and his foot twitched. Oh how he hated to be called 'Mety' (except by a close friend he knew) but he hated being called "short" even more. He leaped up from the ground and let out a battle cry. Then he began to pelt Dedede with muffins, profane words, and political jokes(oh, the horror!).

Kirby watched their amusing fight with a large grin on his face. That is until he glanced at the ground. He screamed bloody murder.

There on the dirt was his beloved cake. It was ruined and covered in sand. "MY CAKE!" Kirby sobbed over dramatically. Meanwhile, Bandana slowly arose from the cacti garden, his sanity regained back. Watching in amusement and pity, he went over to comfort Kirby. Bandana carefully placed a paw on Kirby's back. Still in shock, Kirby screamed and kicked Bandana in the abdomen(**A/N: I have no idea if his anatomy is correct to have that .-.).**

Dedede stopped fighting with Meta Knight and laughed equally as dramatic when he saw what happened. Bandana quickly recovered from the hit and shook his head/body thing.

"But what about your 'dream of eating that exact cake'?"

"Who cares about that, I just didn't want that marshmallow to enjoy it," bellowed the greedy king happily.

"Well it's kind of late for that," Bandana stated, pointing to Kirby's direction. Kirby was sprawled on the ground with his cheeks full of sandy cake. Tears were still flowing down his face. Kirby took cake very seriously. In fact, Kirby Squeak Squad's plot was just about getting his precious cake back. He swallowed and let out a sob. Shaking his head and grunting in defeat, Dedede turned his attention back To Meta Knight.

Dedede cried out and retaliated Meta Knight's earlier attack by grabbing him and barrel rolling with him on the ground to make him dizzy. By accident, he rolled over Bandana as well, dragging him along with Meta Knight. With a lot of bad luck, he happened to barrel roll into the horribly placed cactus garden that Bandana face planted into earlier. All three of them screamed high pitched girly yells of pain when they landed. "NOT AGAIN!" Wailed Bandana.

Kirby started to get tired of their fighting and wails from the cacti puncturing their skin and went to investigate the ship. It was light blue and reminded him from a ship from Mario(/insert something about politics/). The door to the ship opened and Kirby entered. It was a mess in there! Paper scattered all over the floor, a bag of bagels were torn open and placed everywhere, and a blue blob was in the middle of the place! Wait- _blue blob?_

Kirby was about to investigate this strange blob when Bandana,Dedede, and Meta Knight came running into the door of the ship. Somehow, the three of them were uninjured and perfectly fine. King Dedede was arguing with Meta Knight as they entered. "-Well you should be thankful that I even bothered to get that cactus out of your-" Dedede stopped talking and gazed around the ship in awe. "Well you didn't have to pull so hard..." said Meta Knight, as he too examined the ship.

"Hey! What's that thing?" Bandana said pointing to the blob. Kirby shrugged his nonexistent(**A/N:** **You should keep count how many times I say 'nonexistent'. I can assure you it's a lot.)** shoulders. "I dunno, but if it's dead I'm eating it. Since _someone_ ruined my cake," spat Kirby, who was glaring at Dedede. The king smiled sheepishly in response. Bandana pulled out his spear from out of nowhere and poked the alien gently. It moaned and stirred a little. Bandana continued this for a good two minutes until Meta Knight shoved him out of the way and gave the alien a good kick.

The blue blob thing jumped up and shrieked. "Bu-but I brought you your bagels! Now you can keep my toaster safe. Why would you- how did? Auugh! I hate politics mixed into crosswords! That is _not _a fun activity! And-" The creature rambled on, leaving everyone baffled at what it was talking about. He was blue in color with a scarf-like thing on his neck. He had two long ears and lacked arms,legs(pretty much everyone in this messed up world did), and feet. A long cape with yellow trims was draped against his body.

Kirby stared at this weird being. _Bagels, toasters, and political crosswords? What is with this guy? _He thought. The alien paused and stared at the intruders. "Oh, hello..." he said shyly. Dedede winced from his high pitched voice. "Your voice hurts my ears," he complained, while eating a bagel he found on the messy floor. "Well I'm _so_ sorry. One more thing; WHO ARE YOU AND WHY ARE YOU IN MY _BEAUTIFUL_ SHIP?" The strange creature began freaking out and flailing his..Two hands wildly.

"Your _beautiful_ ship crashed into our _beautiful_ land," stated Kirby. The alien- you know what I'm just going to address him as Bob because 'the alien' is getting boring. Bob seemed to calm down a little. "My bad...OH NOOO!" Bob shrieked when he saw the computer's data. Dedede confronted the large computer. "'0/120 energy spheres'? What the heck does that mean?" Bob sniffed. "That's what helps my ship fly... Without the parts the Lor Starcutter won't fly happily in the sky again," Bandana gave Bob a strange look. "'Lor Starccutter'? You named your ship? Someone needs some friends..." Meta Knight laughed. "It's fine to treat objects like living things- Isn't it Galaxia-Boo?~" Meta cooed to his sword.

Everyone stared at the eerie sight. Bob pondered Bandana's statement then felt offended. He walked over to Bandana. "I have friends...On my other planet," Bob said, looking down on the floor. "Really? How many?" Bandana was obviously having a lot of fun talking about a sensitive subject like this.

"Well, you guys are my _best _friends.." Everyone stared at Bob. They suddenly felt kind of bad for this lonely alien. Meta Knight decided to change the subject. "The ship appears to be missing other parts as well," He pointed out. Sure enough, the ship's oars, engines, a part of its bow, and the topsail were absent from the ship. Bob looked up to the strangers(who he already deemed as his best(and only) friends), with a pleading look in his eyes.

"My ship is really wrecked and I don't think I can get all the parts by myself. Could you guys perhaps...?" He asked with a slight lisp. Kirby jumped. Why did he always have to do thing for other people all the time? Clearing his throat in an angry manner, he began to protest.

"Woah- No way! We're busy guys! We have..Things to do. Important things..." Kirby trailed off. Then again, they really had nothing to do.

Bob glared at Kirby, his once friendly stare now icy cold and menacing. "It wasn't really an option." Bob stated coldly. "You can't make us do anything!" protested Bandana dramatically. "Well I was thinking of trapping you in a room with Justin Beiber blaring loudly..That is what made this ship fall...And a dragon."

Everyone gasped- not because of the dragon, but the torture they would face instead. "You horrible monster!" Gasped Dedede. "Fine, we shall-" Meta Knight sighed before continuing. "-Fix your ship," he looked down in shame. "Hooray! Let's be best friends now!" Bob hugged Kirby violently, which made him wheeze from the sudden gesture.

"I don't think I know your names. Mine's Magolor~!" he sang. Bob- I mean- Magolor had no hint of shyness in his voice anymore. Although, his lisp was still quite obvious. "I'm Kirby," said Kirby(well, duh). "I am the ruler of Dreamland; King Dedede! Now bow down and gives me all your taxes in sweets!" Dedede said, clenching his hand dramatically in front of his chest. "And I'm his partner Bandana Dee," Bandana squeaked happily. Magolor nodded, even though he really didn't care. "I'm Meta knight. Behold my power," Meta Knight said flatly. Kirby got closer to Magolor. "Be careful with him- he's a _vampire_!" Meta Knight rolled his eyes in unamusment. "I c_an _hear you," this made Kirby yelp and hide behind Dedede. Because King Dedede was the best meat-sheild. Ever.

"That's great! Now get out of my ship and find my parts," Magolor said, shooing everyone out. It was already dark outside, which should have been impossible since it was just morning 20 minutes ago. Meta Knight grew suspicious of Dedede, who had a mile long grin. "What?"

"I stole a box of muffins..." Dedede snickered. Kirby's eyes bulged. "Wait! Don't show them to Banda-" he was cut off with an excited shriek. The owner of the voice, Bandana, pounced on Dedede and began attacking him. Dedede yelled a girly squeal and tried to pry the insane dee off. Meta Knight and Kirby enjoyed they show, until Magolor came out of his ship, suspicious of the noise.

"What's going on?" Magolor asked approaching the helpless penguin and deranged brown blob. Dedede used Magolor's distraction and managed to pry Bandana off him. Bandana landed on the ground and twitched.

"Here; catch!" Dedede threw the package of muffins, that Bandana attacked for, at Magolor. He caught them, yelping in surprise. Tilting his head, he stared at the muffins, unsure of what to do with them and why he the king had given them to him. "What is-"

Magolor was interrupted with an insane Bandana tackling him to the ground. They tumbled around, Magolor's girly yells of pain filled the quiet night. Kirby nudged Meta Knight and pointed to where the cactus garden used to be. Meta Knight's eyes visibly widened. "Woah, when did they build that?"

In front of them a big building with a welcoming banner with the words: "NOW OPEN; BROKEN GLASS, CATCI, AND RABID ANIMAL (which included lawyers) MUSEUM" Of course, Magolor and Bandana tumbled into there, causing even more girly squeals of pain to fill the area.

The trio (which now consisted of Meta, Dedede, and Kirby, since Bandana and Magolor were trapped inside the horrid museum) shrugged and assumed it would be a while before they came back (heck, Dedede didn't even think they were going to make it. Which is quite reasonable since there were lawyers in there...*shifty eyes*) so they decided to camp in the area instead.

"Hey! I found these tents on the ground! What a lucky, lucky day for us," sang Kirby, dancing around the amazingly found tents. Dedede and Meta Knight gawked at the amazing coincidence... Until the tent burst into flames for no reason.

Kirby fell to the ground on his nonexistent knees. "NOO! WHY MUST NATURE HATE ME SO? I'VE ONLY MURDERED THOUSANDS OF INNCOENT BYSTANDERS!" Kirby sobbed. "We could always go to Walmart and buy some new tents," Dedede suggested. Meta Knight was unamused by his answer.

"This is Dreamland; there's not a building around here for miles! Let alone a Walmart," Meta scoffed. Dedede snorted. "Well- what about the museum, huh? What about it?" he pointed out. Meta Knight grunted in defeat.

"Still, it doesn't mean there's a Walmart around here,"

"Look! There's one right over there," pointed out Dedede.

(**A/N: There's a line where I'm typing this and I have no idea how to remove it. D: So ignore it if it shows up in the story. *grunt*)**The trio gazed at the building that wasn't there moments ago. "I can't tell if logic loves us;or hates our guts," mumbled Kirby. Meta Knight shook his head/body. "Wait, we don't have any money How are we going to get a tent without stealing it?" Meta Knight stated. "Meta Knight, has anyone ever told you that you are a major fun killer?" Asked Dedede, who was doing a mad-lib on politics with Kirby.

Meta Knight just rolled his eyes. "Actually lots of people have told me. I don't try to be fun," Meta spat back. Dedede was about to retort that they were the only people who he was around with when the sound of a door slamming open filled the air.

The door was to the museum, Bandana came out of the museum with his arms/stubs dragging on the ground as he walked. He was beaten up very bad! His bandana was torn there were shards of glass in his skin and a cactus on his back. In his hand was a box of muffins, filled to the brim with very little muffins but a lot of glass. "I got the muffins," he said weakly, swaying slightly.

"Uh, are you okay?" Kirby asked. Bandana nodded. "We left a mess. Blood everywhere. I might clean it. Not a promise though," he wheezed. The door opened again and an even worse looking Magolor came out. He was crying.

"That-that mini Hell is awful!" Magolor let out a sob. "Well there were lawyers in there so what did you expect?" Dedede muttered. The gang noticed that a lawyer escaped the museum when Magolor left. He was currently stalking stalking the crying alien with a look only a lawyer like himself could pull off(what.). The gang all(not Magolor; since he was still bawling like a baby) got a _brilliant_ idea.

The next section of this story involved everyone(again, excluding Magolor) attacking the lawyer and stealing his money. Magolor found a cardboard box and cried in it, Meta Knight was almost defeated by the powerful lawyer's business ray, Kirby was screaming like a banshee while flailing his arms in the lawyers face, Bandana poked the lawyer violently, laughing evilly as he did so, and Dedede just pummeled the lawyer with his trusty hammer.

Then,Kirby stopping being an idiot(not by much) and grabbed the lawyer's suitcase. The lawyer gasped then exploded with a squeal (and a speech about politics), and turned into rainbow colored smoke. Which Kirby inhaled for the heck of it.

An awkward silence followed for a few moments(except Magolor was still crying). Bandana cleared his throat. "So what's the plan?" He asked, magically better. "We're going to Walmart to buy a tent so we can camp outside the Lor!" Kirby exclaimed. Magolor stopped crying and his eyes widened. With a squeak, he stepped out of the box he was in and revealed that his body was magically healed as well. "Really? That's a great idea!" He exclaimed in a tone that was so happy it was sickening. Meta Knight sat up and groaned. "Couldn't we just sleep inside the Lor instead of going through all this trouble to buy a few tents?" he asked, killing the moment of fun from camping again.

"But that wouldn't be fun," Magolor huffed. "I also don't trust you with my wonderful ship," he said coldly. Dedede fidgeted where he was standing at. "How much money did we steal from that lawyer guy?" Dedede asked, not caring for the current conversation. Kirby glanced at the suitcase before opening it. With a grunt of boredom, he opened the lawyer's suitcase and whistled. "A lot," he responded lazily.

Meta Knight sighed. "So in the end we did steal money," Bandana shrugged in response. "That guy was practically a demon beast, so no harm done," he said. Magolor excitedly jumped into the air(don't ask me how, since he lacks legs...). "Well? What are we waiting for? Let's go to Walmart!" he said, with a lot of euphoria in his voice(and lisp). And so, the group of five went to Walmart to buy a tent, cleverly avoiding the plot of repairing Magolor's ship. What horrible horrors await them? Ones that shall make me shake my head in shame...

**A/N:**

**Does anyone like it enough for me to continue? xD This is my first story, blah blah blah. Kirby is owned by Nintendo and Hal Inc. Chapter 2 Hopefully coming soon. Sorry if there are lines at the bottom of some paragraphs. I have no idea how to fix that.**


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